Sister Nivedita, continued

In time I had many opportunities to interact with her. I intuited her immense strength and also realized that she and I were meant for different paths. Immensely talented, she also was a warrior by nature. She was mighty and did not hesitate to impose her will on other people. She was dominating and single minded and liked molding other people to her opinions. If people agreed with her, she could get along with them, otherwise not. From my own experience I can say that although there were many occasions during which I had the opportunity to get really close to her, I resisted such intimacy because I felt an inner resistance. It was not a resistance born out of the fear of ideological difference, but a fear born out of having my entire being besieged.  

I write all this with frankness today because as on the one hand I feared an onslaught on my being by her, on the other hand, she has done me the kind of exceptional favors, that I don’t recollect anybody else doing for me. There are numerous instances of when after meeting her, I have drawn strength from her strength and used my veneration for her as fuel for propelling me forward.

I have never seen any other person who was as capable as she of giving herself wholeheartedly to a cause or a purpose. She gave without restraint or reservation. In these matters neither considerations of health, habit, the sentiments of her near and dear ones, the indifference of Indian society, or the loss of purpose in those she sacrificed herself for, could deter her.  Those who knew her saw the extent to which a human being could exemplify Truth and Consciousness. Her ability to shred through all artificial constraints and hypocritical values, and move towards her goal with boundless energy, remains a magnificent instance of the reaches of human power. Those of us who witnessed this are indeed blessed.